Hello friends. Lately been thinking about anonymity.
When you’re anonymous for almost all of your life – short stint of school-pressured social accounts to delete – so the weathered shadow sits so comfortably on one’s shoulders.
The few times trying to Post things anywhere else comes with an inanity gurgling underneath; when you learn the buoyant form of invisible existing, baseball cap between parking lots to blend, there’s no Other and nothing to shoot for. Nothing to share, nothing to feel bashful and insane about, all tidied and squeaky clean brain for each store clerk halvened interaction.
It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that, once you go too far, you can have entire conversations without existing in them. To be completely interchangeable, though a silhouette; to see two going through the grocery sliding doors, though upon exit so it morphs into the rest.
And it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that once you no longer exist in conversations, you can technically say anything. That’s how it feels most of the time; out-of-pocket observations become matter-of-fact, like the upcoming (and highly anticipated, astroturfed) collapse.
A bummer about anonymity is you lose any sort of inclination toward defense, or deference toward the norm expressing – when was the last time you had an out-of-body experience just by saying things? When you’re anonymous long enough, every word is an out-of-body experience, because you no longer have a body.
So this is the backdrop while conjuring up what to do and of course it’s best to do nothing until it comes to you. The thing about anonymity is that there’s an acquiesence to everything: the further you sink into your silhouette the less concerned you’d ever be about doing anything, actually being anything, or invoking into form the hidden life you live all quietly.
Out of curiosity so there was an attempt to write about Real Life things but so instead one discovers this anonymous sickness instead, however redemptive you could hope to paint it. The only solution ahead is a careful cadence and reassurance you can disappear whenever you want if need be when it all appears too much.
So if you ever do find yourself in the anonymous preference, so one day such a confrontation comes. Time waits for no one of course. Confronting if you’d ever break this shrouded indifferent posturing.
Well, when you do it long enough, the alternatives seem impalpable (´･ω･`)