Do you think creating a website could be selfless?
Of course it can. Of course. Though when one surveys the websites around… is there a selflessness attached?
I certainly see such selflessness (enlightened selfishness) sometimes. There are a good few articles a good few gave a good minute of work and it shows.
Most of the websites I’ve made could be construed as selfless, but it was never an explicit goal. I guess selflessness could inevitably bubble up in one’s actions, despite all protests otherwise.
Though I don’t think I’d want to accept the label. It’d do a disservice to those who put in so much more effort than me – diminish the value of the label.
The big reason why I made my websites was the same as anyone else: an outlet. A place to reason. Sending notes to whoever would want to read it, however they would.
I would write and write because my perceived paranoia left me silent. And I’d write and write because I didn’t know how to handle the curdling emotions that’d come from interactions. Perceived disappointments. Grappling with make-believe bile, so I would cling onto a new world – a life of a world to come.
That’s all I could hold onto. And I held onto it, thick and thin, however queer it appears, e.g. there’s no reason why magic or psychic things can’t exist. But this isn’t as important to preserving (ironically) “sanity” nowadays.
Some of the articles I would write would try to grip on anything redeemable at all while sparring with these “uncomfortable” truths. Stepping right amongst the crumbling sidewalk slabs: stepping boldly into a perspective that made everything worth it. You’ll really find that hope does spring eternal, I suppose.
Since writing was the way to meander around the uncomfortable truths, so, in due time, such truths became so soft and welcoming.
Sometimes I survey our events – and however much I may be involved – nevertheless I laugh and say, “How could it be any other way!” There’s a lot of delight to be had when you think of it that way. When you think of it as a system unfolding. When you wonder what lines you’re bound to be rehearsing.
In any case, Writing has been the main salve against a life filled with temptations and sickness. There was a lot of pacing back and forth. Maybe it was necessary though. I’m not sure if I regret it.
Could a website be selfless? I suppose so, certainly. But I think it’s okay to just exist for a bit. Maybe you’ll accidentally do it anyway.